Tuesday, November 30, 2004

she's got a ticket to ride and she don't care

and why should she?

i love oldies music which is odd since normally my alternative is german death metal but that's neither here nor there.

well, what's happening in jane's world worth mentioning today?? quite honestly: nothing. but we're gonna mention stuff anyway. here we go:

i tasted the nastiest popcorn of my life today. somehow, i got a hold of some zesty butter popcorn that's got pepper all over it. it tastes like ass. like hot and sweaty mexican donkey ass. bleigh. and believe me, i would know... :::shudder:::

the most awesome book in existance is now being turned into a movie. now, dont panic. i throw this little tip of advice in only as a reference.
http://hitchhikers.movies.go.com/ i dont really know how to make my links look cool, so too bad. read this site. and because i said so. my only problem with this movie that i've heard so far is that ford prefect is a black guy in this movie. which means nothing to the majority of you cyberpupils reading this, but this hurts me. because i have a whole mental world in which faceless fictional people live and damnit ford prefect was a white guy. sheesh, after all, he's british. yes, this is a reason somehow. with hind sight being 20/20 and all, it is my suggestion to you so just skip right over this paragraph all together. go on. skip.

thanksgiving ran right around that corner, sure enough. i told him he needed to slow down. went so fast i almost missed it. i'm back at work already. but its okay, i had a good holiday, much to my surprise. thursday i spent playing football and kickball with my neices and nephews. it almost seems like i'm not athletic. never woulda guessed that one. hm. go figure. then spent that night hangin' wit my fella and his peeps. we played cards and dominos and had an all around wholesome good time. i had the best feeling that i've had in a very, very long time. i just felt warm in general. friday i spent christmas shopping. i finally got my mom that car she's been wanting. i bought my dad that fishing boat/yacht he's been eyeing. i got all my sisters a coupon for one free cosmetic surgery of their choice from dr. kuttenpayst. got my newly found/old friend that pair of diamond encrusted jammies. and me and my fella are heading to europe for a month....................................ah, (yawn) and now that ive awoken, i'm flat broke from that $50 i wound up spending at toys r us for the grandyoungins. my checkbook started hemmorhaging. saturday, wound up not going to the world reknowned moscow ballet thanks to the good old fashioned fertility reassuring "Time O' The Month". Yay!! oh, i was so sick. ickity. and sunday pretty much taught me not to enjoy other people's bad moods so much. God will get you for that, i promise. whatever the case, all in all, i had a very good holiday.

so, with that warm and cuddly thought, we've come to the last scrape of this can of condensed soup and i hope you will join me again tomorrow night for another exciting adventure of...of...of...just come back tomorrow, damn.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Well, I said, "Baby, it's 3 a.m. I must be lonely."

well, it just so happens that my stupid little ass was very lonely at 3am this morning. let me tell you about my night. new computer system at work, working late, i'm gonna be getting home around 1:45ish. i'm almost home and this girl flags me down and says she's walked all the way from podunk, louisiana nine miles up the road(passed several houses, which i didnt think about until later) because her car broke down. i offered to use my cell phone to call her house. she gave me a number then said no one was home. so, because i am so smart, i gave her the ride. we proceeded to go the boondocks, which we went to a house where no one was home. she didnt want to wait there, so a car drove by and she got out to talk to them. "no, he doesnt wanna gimme a ride home, can you take me home, please??? please, please, please?????" (sigh) i drove all the way to town #2. i said my car was about to run out of gas so we had to stop at a gas station. she didnt want to call anybody and stay at the gas station. when i asked her her number again, she laughed and said "i aint got no phone." soooo, i talked to the cashier for a while and she called the sheriffs dept to get her a ride home, because she didnt want to get out of my car. so, the cop came inside and asked me if i had been drinking tonight, or if i had done any drugs. then told me there was nobody in my car. i told him i rode all the way up here with somebody. "sure, sure you did." he laughed and said the trucker parked beside me said she bummed a cigarette and took off walking when the cop drove up. yeah, so, i'm not the brightest person in the world. so, what?? so, i gave a complete stranger who smelled very weird a ride to the middle of the ghetto at 2 o'clock in the morning. so, what?? so, i gave a complete stranger the only cash i had, (which was actually only a dollar) so.........what? anyway, i learned a lesson. i'm not gonna tell you what it was, but boy, i learned it. ahem...

on a related note, i had a dream last night (after i got home at a little after 3) that the girl i had picked up was had severe cases of both syphillis and gonnorhea and i drank after her and now i had it. weird. i also dreamed that my fella paraded around in a spandex karate outfit with the headband with long teased blonde 80's hair. as stupid as 80's look looks, it does it for me, yeah, i'm ashamed :::hangs head:::

well, thanksgiving is right around the corner. so close i suggest you slow down or we're about to have a bad run-in. no, i really dont know what that's supposed to mean, but it was funny in my head. i promise. im dreading tomorrow. in a way, its gonna suck ass, because my sisters family is coming in from florida and we're all gonna have to talk about what jane's been doing for the past however long and what all jane's life has become. but at the same time, my sister is bringing herself and her kids and we'll be able to catch up on what all's been going on for us for the past year. these two things are different. just go with me.

gonna go see the nutcracker saturday, yay...

alright chitlens, i'll release you now. go fly, but dont pick up any hitchikers along the way...

Sunday, November 21, 2004

hello darkness, my old friend, i've come to talk with you again...

title is an oldies song, very, very pretty...
i was too depressed to go to church today(imagine that) so, i decided to stay home and update my site. yay for heathenistic activity!!! great weekend, great. met up with an old high school friend, this was a burden reliever in many ways. got to go christmas shopping yesterday at the mall. where, it turns out, i didnt spend a penny. got to spend all day yesterday with my fella, much to his disappointment because he didnt get to play with his friends, but there were so many good ignorances to be had that i wouldnt have wanted to miss out on. i dont even know if ignorances is word, but we'll pretend anyways. shall we??
generally speaking, i write childrens poetry, but here's a quickie to fill up some space, so read it:
>>the clock is on the wall
>the wall is in the hall
>the hall leads to my room
>my room is full of gloom
>the gloom is black and cold
>this gloom is very old
>ive had it many years
>its brought me many tears
>ive cried so many days
>and still, the pain, it stays
>cant seem to make it leave
>although i beg and plead
>i feel lost and alone
>my hearts grown cold now, made of stone
>i'll now get up to leave my room
>my little man made chamber of terror and doom
>i go retrieve that old clock from the wall
>its made with fine glass, heavy and tall
>i smash it across the foot of my bed
>my hands now covered in traces of red
>in one of the pieces i can see part of my face
>for what ive become this is such a disgrace
>i swallow them down one by one
>the pain is incredible, but its almost done
>as i lay in my pool of vomit and blood
>the dark overwhelmes me like a warm loving flood
stop whining, i just to said read it, not enjoy it.
well, web searched, nothing of interest happened anywhere in the entire world today. http://rockyhorror.com/midnt.html that would be soooo kick-ass. but, other than that, nothing of interest happened anywhere in the entire world today.
alright, its time. church is almost over, so i gotta run get my shower so i can hide in my room when my family gets home. later woodknots!!

Thursday, November 18, 2004


UPDATE TIME!! dont get too excited now. calm down everybody. there we go.

well, here we are again. staring blankly at each other across the vast reaches of cyber space. me: searching for some kind of outlet for which i can spill a piece of myself, have someone pick it up, and still remain anonymous. you: either searching blindly in a swirl of boredom or you're dating me and are obligated to land here at least once a day. either way, you're a very, very lucky person. its best if you dont ask how and just go with it. i promise. trust me.

anyways. i'm at work getting paid for doing, well, this. my job is sooo draining. everyday on the way home, i wonder if i should see if my car really is heavy enough to break the side of the overpass side rails. sure enough, everyday i chicken out. eh, somehow this is probably for the best also. mostly, because i know my mother cant really afford a funeral right now. damn, jane. shush.

http://www.rense.com/general31/tinyt.htm my first link, wee-hoo! we who?? what? anyway. neat little story about just how small midgets can be. or aliens. either way, there's pictures. so, LOOK!

in looking for this story i was actually amazed just how hard it is NOT to stumble upon porn. i mean, damn. everybody in the world is not interested in just how wide the youngest pussy we can find can open. bleigh. yeah, some of us normal folks out there have porn phobias. sheesh. society could stand to be a little more subtle. thats all i'm sayin'. there's no mystery left in anything involving anything sexual. mystery is the whole reason anything is sexy (well, to me). subtlety and quiet suprise. real people have nothing to offer these days. anything you want to know about sex is readily handed to you in whatever form you prefer: magazine, television, film, internet. you dont have to figure out anything at all on your own. there's no true discovery. all of that actually took a long time to write, because most of it was in phobic thought. so, if it doesnt all fit together, hopefully you get my point...whatever it was.

anywho, i was just given the lunch order for work, so await another exciting update whenever i get around to sliding off my lazy butt...

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

i wrote a note and said i'm sorry i had a bad day again...

i really, really used to like that song alot. for some strange reason i still do. hm. well, i'm sitting here getting ready to go to the eye doctor (yay!!) and get new glasses because mine were crushed in a tragic tickling accident this weekend. no more needs to be said. -----

about a week ago, i had a really bad day. so, on my way to work, this happened:

ode to the whore

eeney meeney miney one
let's cut out her nasty tongue
eeney meeney miney two
let's hold her throat till she turns blue
eeney meeney miney three
let's saw her legs off at the knee
eeney meeney miney four
she's barely screaming anymore
eeney meeney miney five
we wonder how she's still alive
eeney meeney miney six
let's prod her nerves and make her twitch
eeney meeney miney seven
i think its time we sent her to heaven
eeney meeney miney eight
let's pull her bones out; lay them straight
eeney meeney miney nine
you grab her skull; i'll grab her spine
eeney meeney miney ten
and this is where we say the end...:)

well, my sisters calling and i've gotta go. hopefully i wont come out looking like daria from mtv. 'course i already do, so.....so, nevermind then.


Thursday, November 11, 2004


well, here i sit at work, bored out of my skull as usual. avoiding going home, because my only reason for going home anyway is unconscious right now. eh, oh well.
i had a strange dream last night. i dreamt that a tiny me fell into a pile of stephen king books, which i only know because it was written on the sides of the books. and then a tiny me flew through the stories. i started in church and wound up underground in "heaven" with a lot of beautiful mindless people and with any sinful thoughts or actions they were sent straight to hell. in hell (which is where i wound up next) they tied my hair back and i had to place my face ever so carefully in a vat of boiling grease-like liquid. but it had a steel mask in it, so it would only burn out my eyes (lucky, lucky me) then they drug me by my hair down an isle through the cells of all the other people in hell while they all pulled at my clothes and screamed. turns out it was all a dream and i woke up in the backseat of a car with the people i babysat for (i do not actually babysit) and they were all the people i was in hell with. weird.
then there was a small town concert, an orgy, i wound up making out with the fat guy from the butterfly effect and telling my boyfriend all about it. thats where it no longer became interesting. so, thats where i'll save you and go onto something else.

oh, hey, did you hear that britney spears was pregnant?? hm. did you care? yeah, me neither.
moving on...

i saw a pair of cosmetically altered breasts the other day. in person. i also saw a chart on all sorts of strange and wonderful breast surgeries. so, i've decided that i need breast augmentation and if any of you would like to donate, $10,000 would be a nice start. so, feel free...

useless facts stolen from another website, enjoy:
Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left handed people do...take that lefties!

The average human head weighs about 8 pounds...this explains sooooo much.

Human thighbones are stronger than concrete...yet if they collide, say from 3 stories up, they are not.

anywho, thats about all of that that i care to do today. class dismissed

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

El Dia De Dos

well, here we are at day two. which is actually three days away from day one. its a mathmatical anomoly, just flow with it. this apparently is showing how my dedication is going to be. sadly, i'm already disappointed in myself with this. eh, we'll get over it.

i recently read some of the other blogs that we have here on our opening page, and by some, i mean one. i was so sorely disappointed in my own site i somehow had overlooked the underachievement of the other sites. so, i now feel better. i also have realized today that i no longer have the ability to spell, so please feel free to correct in a comment or two (i mean that, YOU)

speaking of words children (hm) our word for the day is: shit, because i suddenly cant remember how to spell the word that i was going to put on here that i learned yesterday. oh, well. well, my alternative, which i seem to have no choice but to use is: intermammory sulcus. this is the proper term for the place between your breasts. not quite cleavage, because its not the split, its just the flesh. so there. dont you feel smarter??

and i'm starting to run late for work, so i'm gonna have to cut you kids off early. sorry about that. dont cry to hard. i said DONT!!!

anyway, i love you all sort of and leave me a comment and tell me the same back. its okay, its not because you mean it, its because i told you to, so that makes it morally right, thank you :) and goodnight

Sunday, November 07, 2004

day one

well, this is day one...yay! for me.
anyway, apparently this is my page, this is a test. just curious to find out how this works...sooooo. here we are. yay! for me again.
hm. let's see. to explain the name. trapped in the void: this is where i usually am. trapped in a place between misery and depression. not really much going on there. mostly dark and void. lots of poetry and obessive compulsion goin'on though. but that will come much, much later.
im mainly just seeing if this works as it says it does, so if anyone stumbles upon my page, please, oh, please leave a comment.
the end :)