Monday, February 22, 2010

happy birthday to me....for the 27th time.

just kiddin'. the only person reading this website had been reminded repeatedly, and forcefully, that tomorrow is my birthday. there will be NO forgetting.

so, this is my last entry as a 26 year old girl. in an hour and two minutes, i'll officially be a 27 year old girl. ehh. maybe we have to wait till noon tomorrow. meh, anyway. so, what have i done in the past year?? what have i done to separate my 26th year from all my other years?? well. i finally grew to over 150 lbs. 152 was the highest i've ever gotten i believe. enough to make me sick when i looked at myself naked. i started out on a quest for health. i gave up pork 100%. which i highly recommend everyone on earth doing. those jews were really onto something. on this quest for health, i lost 13 pounds and felt awesome. upon further, deeper, inspection into the realm of food preparation, i discovered how cows become hamburger and how chickens, they don't disguise that at all. hm. ahh. how chickens become nuggets. i lost the ability to eat meat with a clear conscience knowing i was giving money to the people who were doing that. then i discovered that no animal was harmed in the making of an oreo, and all of my weight is coming back. i hit 143 last week. why did my diet section of this update take this long?? what else??

oh, well, there's that one thing, but know....

fwoo. so, 26 has brought me closer to my spiritual self, more confident in the bedroom, ironically enough more wrinkles on my forehead, a greater appreciation of having my own income, less meat more sugar, a little more anxious to get the hell outta louisiana, and possibly the worst update in the history of this tiny, tiny website.

here i come, age 27!!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010 masturbation was the last thing i blogged about, huh?

gotta get that outta the way and out of your view!!

i feel a little ashamed i was on vacation for an entire week and have no updates to show for it. my vacation was rather lack luster in the story telling department. for nearly nine days straight, i sat on the couch, drank, slept, (please see above)ate, played mario wii, and humped. all. week. long. i also cleaned house and cooked supper nightly. again, it doesn't make for good story telling at all, but it was a damn fine week.

the week of all weeks finally came to a close on sunday, valentine's day. i woke my lover with breakfast in bed complete with strawberries, chocolate syrup, and whipped cream (along with the other breakfast standards) did something dirty and ridiculously unjanelike but for the sake of our younger readers let's just say "i put his penis in my mouth while we watched a pornographic movie". he took me out to eat at the loving hut, a nice vegan restaurant in the great land of houstonia. the food was amazing, but the service left something to be desired. it took a LONG time to arrive at our table and when it finally did, it was served individually instead of together. he got his a good solid 5 minutes before i saw mine. but aside from that, the people were super friendly and polite and the food was delicious. he got the bbq vermicelli and they had these little white strips on the side. i have no idea what they were, but they were identical to the smokey aftertaste you get when eating sausage out of a bbq pit. i nearly came. it even had the fatty texture of beef. i got the sweet and sour divine. a mock sweet and sour chicken dish, that tasted less like chicken that his did like beef, but the seasoning was *perfect*. we'll definitely be eating there again, but i think next time we'll be ordering take out and enjoy our meal at the same time.

after that we went to bed, bath, and beyond and found only a bunt pan to purchase. that's cool because next week i'm gonna bake the hell outta some monkey bread. mmmm. can't wait!

then, we went and saw avatar in 3d. everything everyone said about it is true. it's probably one of the best movies i've ever seen, Ever. i would also like to point out, the older i get, the more tree huggy i get. please keep that in mind.

he took me out to get frozen yogurt. we came home. played some super mario brothers. ordered from pizza hut and then i begrudgingly had to head back home to louisiana.

:: sigh ::