Friday, October 28, 2005

wheels on the car go round and round...

I BOUGHT A CAR!!! woo-hoo!! my new car is a 2004 chevy cavalier. saw it by accident on the way home last saturday. we stopped to look at another car and a little electric blue cavalier happened to be parked right next to it. got the number, i met with the guy, test-drove, went to the bank, GOT APPROVED for my very own car loan and i picked up my car yesterday. it's so much more lightweight than my enormous taurus. every bump and i feel like i may fly off the road. but other than that, it runs great, gets better gas mileage, IT'S CLEAN, and it has FIVE cup holders. can you imagine??

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

fucked up...

my blog has been messing up the past few days. just wanted to do a quick update to see if anything showed up...

Monday, October 10, 2005

a sex picnic

my favorite song today:

The Origin of Love

When the earth was still flat,
And the clouds made of fire,
And mountains stretched up to the sky,
Sometimes higher,
Folks roamed the earth
Like big rolling kegs.
They had two sets of arms.
They had two sets of legs.
They had two faces peering
Out of one giant head
So they could watch all around them
As they talked; while they read.
And they never knew nothing of love.
It was before the origin of love.
The origin of love
And there were three sexes then,
One that looked like two men
Glued up back to back,
Called the children of the sun.
And similar in shape and girth
Were the children of the earth.
They looked like two girls
Rolled up in one.
And the children of the moon
Were like a fork shoved on a spoon.
They were part sun, part earth
Part daughter, part son.

The origin of love

Now the gods grew quite scared
Of our strength and defiance
And Thor said,"I'm gonna kill them all with my hammer,
Like I killed the giants."
And Zeus said, "No,You better let me use my lightening, like scissors,
Like I cut the legs off the whales and dinosaurs into lizards.
"Then he grabbed up some bolts
And he let out a laugh,
Said, "I'll split them right down the middle.
Gonna cut them right up in half."
And then storm clouds gathered above
Into great balls of fire
And then fire shot down
From the sky in bolts
Like shining blades of a knife.
And it ripped right through the flesh
Of the children of the sun and the moon and the earth.
And some Indian god sewed the wound up into a hole,
Pulled it round to our belly to remind us of the price we pay.
And Osiris and the gods of the Nile
Gathered up a big storm
To blow a hurricane,
To scatter us away,
In a flood of wind and rain,
And a sea of tidal waves,
To wash us all away,
And if we don't behave
They'll cut us down again
And we'll be hopping round on one foot
And looking through one eye.

Last time I saw you
We had just split in two.
You were looking at me.
I was looking at you.
You had a way so familiar,
But I could not recognize,
Cause you had blood on your face;
I had blood in my eyes.
But I could swear by your expression
That the pain down in your soul
Was the same as the one down in mine.
That's the pain,
Cuts a straight line
Down through the heart;
We called it love.
So we wrapped our arms around each other,
Trying to shove ourselves back together.
We were making love,
Making love.
It was a cold dark evening
,Such a long time ago,
When by the mighty hand of Jove,
It was the sad story
How we became lonely two-legged creatures,
It's the story ofThe origin of love.

That's the origin of love.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

A righteous man regardeth the life of his beast

Proverbs 12:10

I've taken a (more severe) recent interest in animal cruelty. I've been TiVoing animal cop shows for quite a while now. I'm stupified by the amount of apathy some people display. A week or two ago at work, a girl wanted to look at gross pictures. So, we wandered around for a while then ventured into google images to look for deformities, dead people, whatever. So, with my gory interest poked, I went on a search for the nastiest stuff I could find. Different methods of torture of humans and animals. Anyways, I've had my little interests change back and forth to different things the last few days, but I stumbled across the dog meat market in Korea. Wow. I seriously doubt any of the 2.3 people who monthly look at my site have any interest in this sort of thing, but just in case this website has alot of very interesting and educational information on the Korean dog and cat meat trade.

Snippit: Koreans believe that dogs that die painfully will release more adrenaline into their flesh, creating a more potent and flavorful meat.

On a lighter note:

Have you ever heard of a mooncup?? I found one on ebay. I am intrigued by this, if not a little frightened.

I found the coolest bathtub today. It glows in the dark, right up my alley. They even have a sink to match.

A penis-cheeto. I so, so, SO need to start doing ebay. The shipping on this damn thing is $5.00.

And here we have a penis cozy.

Okay, I'll stop talking about penises now. Partially because it's becoming less amusing and mostly because a supervisor just walked in.

I am still at work at....2:45 in the morning. My car has once again proven to be a complete piece of shit. I say that. It has given me alot of headache, but I guess in all honesty I havent really given it the best treatment. I drive it as hard as I can, and I rarely change the oil. So, I suppose this is ultimately my fault. WHATEVER THE CASE, I am in need of a new car. Seriously, seriously in need of a new car.

And, as usual, nothing really of interest has happened lately. I'm sitting at work, bored, looking for crap on the internet. Most of which isnt worth creating a link for. So, assuming you stopped by and got this far, thanks...