Thursday, July 27, 2006

My Perfect Pussy

for about a week now, i've been seriously considering trying to find a way to con bradford into letting me get a cat. either a black or a tuxedo. i finally asked him about it on the 24th (monday) and kind of blew it off. tuesday night (the 25th, durh) i called home about 8 or so, brad said "guess what i found" "a kitty" "yeah" i thought surely he was full of it, but i came home that night and sure enough i have a new small, black female kitty. she's beautiful and perfect. must be by you at all times and curls up with me to watch tv. majority black with red tips to her belly fur and bright, bright green eyes. she curls up in a little black ball and looks up and all you can see is her huge eyes. she's go gorgeous. besides the fact that she's a walking skeleton. so, i took her to the vet on wednesday morning and found out she's VERY pregnant and she's only about 4 to 5 months old. so, all the factors considered: her extreme malnutrition and her severely young age to be pregnant, i dont think she'll be able to survive giving birth or that she'd be old enough to really know what to do with them. so, she'll be spayed this coming monday.

go ahead, call me a monster. it's okay.

we had some debate on what to name her. i really wanted to go for clover, karma, or onyx. but we finally settled on mina. she's exactly what i wanted in a cat. perfect.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

the irish hair piece

alot's happened since i really updated last. we had july the 4th when i got to eat rattlesnake for the first time. tastes identical to chicken, only slightly different texture.

we had the weekend after july the 4th when i got the second most drunk i ever had in my life off a mixture of some butt-tasting wine cooler, mixed with vodka, mixed with orange juice, mixed with everclear. yes, sir. cooter brown??

we finally got off our lazy scared asses at work, marched into the bosses office and spilled everything there was to spill about honestly the laziest person i've ever worked with. i dont say those words lightly. i, personally, am a very, VERY lazy person. i think we all know that. but, well. i've heard it's bad luck to extensively discuss work online, so i wont. suffice it to say, as of monday the person in question no longer works with me.

so, since i've had it by myself, last week i think i wound up with 45 or 46 hours for the week. and anything over 40 is time and a half. which i'm sure is common knowledge, but it still tickles me on the inside to say it.

sooo, two or three days later, i walked in and heard that the lady i replaced 3 years ago is now back applying for the job. so, i'm going to have to train her how to bill. i'm gonna try to be as optimistic as possible and see how this works out. i was told she's a very likely candidate.

last thursday night at work, i was about to leave and lady came in and asked if i'd hit a bird. no?? so, another girl i work with went out and got it. he was grayish brown and half bald. i was afraid to hold it at first. everybody there was trying to find a way to kill it nicely or just throw it at the edge of the woods. so, "guess who" decided to take it home and have it euthanized at my vet the next morning. which i think would be more humane then just letting it eventually die or be eaten. so, up at the butt crack of dawn the next morning, i discover my vet is closed. so, i drive to ruston instead where they get me in touch with a small wildlife rehabilitator (turns out he's a mocking bird) and little Goblin will live happily ever after.

this past weekend, we went to fort smith saturday to pick up a pinball machine. loooooooong aaaaaaaaass triiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip. that's all. loooooooooooong aaaaaaaaaaaaaaass triiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip. we had a good time though.

oh, and my mouth exploded on one side due to Her Peas. yay. not much else to that story but ouch.

Monday, July 17, 2006

a totally organic experience

new favorite shampoo?? herbal essences: color me happy. my hair smells GREAT!! buy some. it works.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

shit eater

i found out today, for definite sure, without a doubt: my dog eats kitty litter. not just any kitty litter, USED KITTY LITTER!!

any suggestions??

Monday, July 03, 2006

stuff you're not going to read