I SEND THE PAIN BELOW

i realize i havent done a real update in nearly a week now. nothing really new has happened. comments have been disallowed indefinitely thanks to some recent shananagins and going's on. they may or may not be opened up later.

for any of you who may not know this, the vast majority of my post titles are either song names or song lyrics. and contrary to popular belief, i rarely ever write my own poetry anymore, so most of the poems posted here are mere plagairisms. nothing more. the last post was by the dresden dolls. i bought a new cd of theirs over this past weekend. and when i say new, i have no idea when it was put out, but i've never heard it before. the line about her doing her thing while watching school kids out the window struck me. i thought it was an odd song. the song i'll be copying for this particular post is by duncan sheik. it was playing on a radio in another office a few minutes ago. realizing i havent heard it in a while, i looked up the lyrics because i like this song. i'll post it for you now:


I know what you’re doing,
I see it all to clear
I only taste the saline
when I kiss away your tears

You really had me going,
wishing on a star
But the black holes that surround you
are heavier by far

I believed in your confusion,
you were so completely torn
Well it must have been that yesterday
was the day that I was born

There’s not much to examine,
there’s nothing left to hide
You really can’t be serious
if you have to ask me why
I say good-bye...

‘Cause I am barely breathing
And I can’t find the air
I don’t know who I’m kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day

But I don’t suppose it’s worth the price,
worth the price
The price that I would pay

Everyone keeps asking,
what’s it all about?
I used to be so certain
and I can’t figure out

What is this attraction?
I only feel the pain
There’s nothing left to reason
and only you to blame
Will it ever change?

‘Cause I am barely breathing
And I can’t find the air
I don’t know who I’m kidding
Imagining you care

And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don’t suppose it’s worth the price,
worth the price
The price that I would pay

But I’m thinking it over anyway...

I’ve come to find I may never know
Your changing mind
Is it friend or foe?
I rise above
Or sink below

With every time
You come and go
Please don’t come and go

‘Cause I am barely breathing
And I can’t find the air
I don’t know who I’m kidding
Imagining you care

And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don’t suppose it’s worth the price,
worth the price
The price that I would pay

But I’m thinking it over anyway


that's the end of the song. in addition to the dresden dolls cd, i also bought portishead's first cd. or what i'm assuming is their first cd. it is titled simply "portishead". it rocks ass. not as much ass as dummy rocks. but ass ample enough.

First Orgasm

it is a thursday

i get up early

it is a challenge

i'm usually lazy

i make some coffee

I eat some rice chex

and then i sit down

to check my inbox

i only read a word or two

i stare across the street and see

the churches and the blue

the first orgasm of the morning

is cold and hard as hell

there won't be any second coming

as far as i can tell

i arch my back cause

i'm very close now

it's very cold here

by the window

there are some school kids

yelling and running

they barely notice

that i am cumming

the first orgasm of the morning

is like a fire drill

it's nice to have a little warning

but not enjoyable

i am too busy to have friends

a lover would just complicate my plans

so i will never look for love again

i'm taking matters into my own hands

i think i could last at least a week without someone to hold me

i think i could last at least a week without someone to hold me

won't you hold me?

terrorist pussy

yeah, i actually got off my lazy ass TWO days in a row to update. touch me.

the brad was playing last night so, i came home to a house all too quiet. after about 20 minutes of this silence, i went to check the phone. perhaps someone has called?? on my way i noticed the entire top shelf of the bookcase was scattered artistically all over the floor and behind the dresser and the phone cord snatched from the wall and ever so slightly chewed. so, yeah, any missed calls were just missed. i have retarted cats, what can i say??

Oh, what a tangled web we weave...

Nobody told me adult life would be this hard…Inappropriate Fridays. Mm mm mm.

What have I done over the past week?? Last Friday night, extreme yield played at ropers here in bossier. I got off work and went and hung out at the hotel BY MY BIG OLE SELF for the first time ever. Yeah, that's right. I'm a big girl now. I got to do some naked prancing, or well, from the bathroom to the bed, at least. I got to see majority The Craft for the first time. Turns out, it was a good movie after all. So, I put on my pj's and hopped into bed. I was half alive but I felt mostly dead. I like that song, you shut up. Anyways, I put on my cutest night gown and wound up going to sleep untoussled.

Saturday did indeed happen.

Sunday morning, as I was getting ready, I put on a semi-fresh pair of socks and tumbled my ass down the living room stairs landing with all my force on my left butt cheek on the corner of the next to last step. My right foot came crashing down with us and the arch of my foot landed on the corner of the bottom step. My left butt cheek is now exaggerated slightly swollen, blue, red, and purple. It's purty. After I was able to walk without crying, we went to an auction in shreveport. The only pretty stuff they had there wound up going for hundreds of dollars. I guess I have expensive tastes. Though you couldn’t tell by looking at me. Who knew?? So, I wound up getting a descently sized mirror for only ten bucks, so the day wasn’t a loss.

Monday, LABOR DAY!!! We went grocery shopping hungry and spent about $130 between the two of us. Though I did finally get a frame for a fairy poster I bought about two years ago. And 6 or 7 pairs of underoos. They're cuties. Lots of skulls and other halloweeny things to adorn my crotch.

I had a mostly uneventful week up until now. And well, now I'm sitting at my desk drinking frappuccino about to start my cash report. Weeeee hooooo!!! Extreme yield is playing again this Friday (now) and Saturday (tomorrow) nights in Natchitoches. YOU SHOULD COME, vernacular man.

And hellow, you!! Person to whom I am not speaking. Ssssssshhhhhhhh.

cat
no name. sad. needing a home. purty.

dear reader part deux

extreme caution is playing again this weekend at ropers night life in bossier city. COME. my previous request was ignored, so you will do as i say or prepare to face the wrath of JANE.

please??

sincerely,

the jane :)