YOU'RE A FOUNTAIN OF BLOOD...IN THE SHAPE OF A GIRL

well, hm. it's been forever since i've updated. not much of actual interest has happened lately.

tons of little stuff has happened. i went to my first football game (and tailgate party, we who?)last weekend. i complained the entire 20 minutes we were there. which sounds bad, but we got in for free, i had a great start for a migraine, and there was some fat guy behind us screaming at the field after every play. i leaned over and whispered "i feel like turning around and saying 'thank you, i love you'." (i looked and looked and looked for an appropriate link for that, but nothing came up. its from the show starved and its what sam's yoga teacher told him to say to people who annoyed him instead of saying something mean.)

i was awakened abruptly the other morning when mork, our DARLING cat, stuck his head in a glass of water next to the bed and knocked it over onto my head and upper back. this freezing water proceeded to run all the way down, so i half slept for the next few hours shivering in a never ending pool. (i am a VERY hard sleeper) i got up every so often to pee and fetch another towel. i dont know how on earth that little cup held that many gallons of ever flowing water.

1 to 2 of my puppies were almost given freely away day before yesterday to total strangers. this did not happen and we'll not discuss it further. hopefully this will not become an issue again. you.

we've developed an infestation of fleas in the house recently. i wonder if that's my fault?? hmmmm. anyways. i was kept awake the majority of last night because of one little flea. just one. not biting, just crawling around and around. i'd wake up just enough to slap myself, then realize he moved somewhere else. i finally woke up in a really, really good mood at 6:30 and COOKED breakfast. can you imagine?? i then took out the trash, washed a couple loads of clothes and such, and exercised while watching tv. i finally realized what was going on when i started my period. ah ha, this explains EVERYTHING. i finished off the day this evening with 3 or 4 spontaneous bouts of crying.

that hasn't really been that uncommon recently. i dont know if i'm 'becoming' bipolar, or what, if that's even possible, but my emotions are always topsyturvey(like i know how the fuck to spell that word{s}) generally speaking these days, my emotions are on either one end of the spectrum or the other. it's rare that i get a happy medium. the splats of giddiness are great and relationshippally(yeah, made that one up myself, couldnt tell, couldja??) rewarding. but the blops of greater depression than i'm used to are getting increasingly unbearable. i'm a generally awkward person, but i'm finding it harder and more frustrating to try to act more semi-non-awkward than your average semi-non-awkward person. but i'm beginning to think about considering looking into the possibility of anti-depressants. as much as i've always thought this idea was ridiculous, because i consider my paranoias, fears, awkwardnesses, and other such problems to be relatively normal, everybody has quirks, right??

for lack of a better, more appropriate ending to this entry...